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Unauthorized tell all book says Oprah is gay

First and foremost why are you surprised that Gayle King supporting Oprah Winfrey is gay?  What same sex or even opposite sex best friends do you know go on private vacations together, purchase elaborate and intimate gifts for and always has around like an accessory?  I don’t know of anyone but then again my friends are not billionaires.  Nonetheless the tabloids have been reporting for years that Oprah, the queen of daytime television is gay but no one wanted to dig deep into it until Kitty Kelly did some dirt digging and unveiled the real Oprah who had secret crushes on Diane Sawyer and other women throughout the years.  She even went around paying people off to keep her little gay secrets.  Please make all checks payable to: ME.

According to Kelly (cause Kitty is just too funny to say in an article about a gay woman), Oprah did not live the dirt poor life she has constantly portrayed over the years but rather Oprah was a child who was spoiled by her mother.  So no pet roach names or lack of new clothing for the billionaire.  Kelly interviewed Oprah’s family, cousins and her father, who she reports is not really Oprah’s father; he just took her in when Oprah started stealing and turning tricks for money.  Oprah don’t even let her mother have her telephone number, now that’s cold.

But what about Stedman you ask?  What about him, according to Kelly he is just an accessory for Oprah to appear normal to the millions of housewives and mindless women who believe her words to be the gospel truth, which she finds boring.  Kelly is being shunned by media outlets across the country because people have either dealt with Oprah or want to deal with Oprah but from a former employee Oprah operates Harpo productions like a cult and everyone walks around on pins and needles.  Oh my…who is this Oprah?  My guess…(Comment stopped by a Oprah henchman).

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